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Lyrics by John McLeod and Henry Cheung, Blue & Gold Chairs 0T6-0T7'' | Lyrics by John McLeod and Henry Cheung, Blue & Gold Chairs 0T6-0T7'' | ||
<br /> | <br /> | ||
'''Barrett's Privateers''' <br /> | |||
''by Stan Rogers'' | |||
<br /> | |||
Oh the year was seventeen seventy eight <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
A letter of marque came from the King <br /> | |||
To the scummiest vessel I've ever seen <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
CHORUS: <br /> | |||
God Damn them all! I was told <br /> | |||
We'd cruise the seas for American gold <br /> | |||
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears <br /> | |||
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier <br /> | |||
The last of Barrett's privateers. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Oh Elcid Barrett cried the town, <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
For twenty brave men, all fishermen, who <br /> | |||
Would make for him the Antelope's crew, <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
She'd a list to port and her sails in rags, <br /> | |||
And a cook in the scuppers with staggers and jags. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
On the King's birthday we put to sea. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
We were ninety-one days to Montego bay, <br /> | |||
Pumping like madmen all the way. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
On the ninety-sixth day we sailed again. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
When a bloody great Yankee hove in sight <br /> | |||
With our cracked four-pounders we made to fight <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The Yankee lay low down with gold. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
She was broad and fat and loose in stays, <br /> | |||
But to catch her took the Antelope two whole days <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Then at length we stood two cables away. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
Our cracked four-pounders made an awful din, <br /> | |||
But with one fat ball the Yank stove us in. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The Antelope shook and pitched on her side. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs, <br /> | |||
And the maintruck carried off both me legs. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
So here I lay in my twenty-third year. <br /> | |||
I wish I were in Sherbrooke now! <br /> | |||
It's been six years since we sailed away, <br /> | |||
And I just made Halifax yesterday. <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
'''Yogi Bear''' | |||
<br /> | |||
I've got a friend in Jellystone Park <br /> | |||
Yogi, Yogi <br /> | |||
I've got a friend in Jellystone Park <br /> | |||
Yogi Yogi Bear <br /> | |||
Yogi Yogi Bear, Yogi Yogi Bear <br /> | |||
I've got a friend in Jellystone Park <br /> | |||
Yogi-Yogi Bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Yogi has a girlfriend <br /> | |||
Cindy, Cindy <br /> | |||
Yogi has a girlfriend <br /> | |||
Cindy Cindy Bear <br /> | |||
Cindy Cindy Bear, Cindy Cindy Bear <br /> | |||
Yogi has a girlfriend <br /> | |||
Cindy Cindy Bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The following verses are sung in the same manner as above: <br /> | |||
Cindy likes it in the dark <br /> | |||
Black bear, Black bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it upside down <br /> | |||
Koala bear, Koala bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it interracial <br /> | |||
Panda bear, Panda bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it really rough <br /> | |||
Grizzly bear, Grizzly bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy doesn't shave down there <br /> | |||
Grizzly bear, Grizzly bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it from behind <br /> | |||
Brown bear, Brown bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it underage <br /> | |||
Teddy bear, Teddy bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it soft and squishy <br /> | |||
Gummy bear, Gummy bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it sweet and sticky <br /> | |||
Honey bear, Honey bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy likes it on the freezer <br /> | |||
Polar bear, Polar bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Cindy makes sure condoms are used <br /> | |||
Care bear, Care bear <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
'''Chicago''' | |||
<br /> | |||
CHORUS: <br /> | |||
I used to work in Chicago in an old department store <br /> | |||
I used to work in Chicago but I don't work there anymore! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a fishing pole <br /> | |||
A fishing pole from the store <br /> | |||
A fishing pole she wanted, my rod she got! <br /> | |||
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh! <br /> | |||
And I don't work there anymore <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for some apples <br /> | |||
Some apples from the store <br /> | |||
Some apples he wanted, my cherry he got! <br /> | |||
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh! <br /> | |||
And I don't work there anymore <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The following verses are sung in the same manner as above: <br /> | |||
A woman came in for a diamond ring <br /> | |||
A diamond ring she wanted, pearl necklace she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for some cups <br /> | |||
Some cups he wanted, my jugs he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some cat food <br /> | |||
Some cat food she wanted, some meat in her pussy she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for some gloves <br /> | |||
Some gloves he wanted, my muff he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a screen door <br /> | |||
A screen door she wanted, the back door she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some hamburger <br /> | |||
Some hamburger she wanted, my meat/sausage she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for some lobster <br /> | |||
Some lobster he wanted, my crabs he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a hammer <br /> | |||
A hammer she wanted, nailed she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for thirteen squared <br /> | |||
Thirteen squared he wanted, one sixty-nine he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some bolts <br /> | |||
Some bolts she wanted, my nuts she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for a bag <br /> | |||
A bag he wanted, my box he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a piano <br /> | |||
A piano she wanted, my organ she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for a vacuum <br /> | |||
A vacuum he wanted, sucked he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for some flowers <br /> | |||
Some flowers he wanted, my two-lips he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a rooster <br /> | |||
A rooster she wanted, my cock she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came in for a leaf blower <br /> | |||
A good blower he wanted, a good sucking he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a fishing lure, <br /> | |||
A lure she wanted, my Canadian wiggler she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came for a Shakespearing character <br /> | |||
Horatio he wanted, Felatio he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for an automatic transmission <br /> | |||
A transmission she wanted, my stick she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man came for some KFC <br /> | |||
KFC he wanted, my greasy box he got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A man/woman came in for an (insert guys/girls name) <br /> | |||
(Name) he/she wanted, disappointed he/she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for vinyl flooring, <br /> | |||
Flooring she wanted, my hardwood she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a Ford, <br /> | |||
An Explorer she wanted, explore her I did! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for the alphabet, <br /> | |||
ABC she wanted, an STD she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a Kit Kat <br /> | |||
A Kit Kat she wanted, four fingers she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a makeover <br /> | |||
A makeover she wanted, a facial she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some electricity <br /> | |||
Some electricity she wanted, the shocker she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for employment <br /> | |||
Employment she wanted, a rim job she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a Jesus <br /> | |||
A Jesus she wanted, the second coming she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a ruler <br /> | |||
A ruler she wanted, my 12 inches she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some floorboards <br /> | |||
Some floorboards she wanted, my tongue and groove she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a G.I. Joe <br /> | |||
A G.I. Joe she wanted, my Cobra Commander she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a deck of cards <br /> | |||
52 she wanted, 69'd she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a pickeled deer <br /> | |||
A pickeled deer she wanted, a dill doe she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a metaphysical conversation <br /> | |||
A metaphysical conversation she wanted, fucked she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for bowling ball <br /> | |||
A bowling ball she wanted, fingered and tossed in the gutter she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for an unwashed Mexican <br /> | |||
An unwashed Mexican she wanted, a dirty Sanchez she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some shoes <br /> | |||
We didn't have any shoes, so I fucked her! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a sub sandwich <br /> | |||
A sub she wanted, my footlong she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for some quick service <br /> | |||
Quick service she wanted, quickly serviced she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Killer verses: <br /> | |||
A woman came in for a pregnancy test <br /> | |||
A pregnancy test she wanted, a punch in the gut she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
A woman came in for a coat hanger <br /> | |||
A coat hanger she wanted, an abortion she got! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
'''The Gangbang Song''' | |||
<br /> | |||
Knock knock <br /> | |||
Who's there? <br /> | |||
Anita <br /> | |||
Anita who? <br /> | |||
I need a... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
CHORUS: <br /> | |||
...gangbang, and always will <br /> | |||
Because a gangbang gives her such a thrill <br /> | |||
When she was younger, and in her prime <br /> | |||
She used to gangbang all the time! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Knock knock <br /> | |||
Who's there? <br /> | |||
Truman<br /> | |||
Truman who? <br /> | |||
Is it true man I saw your mamma at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The following verses are sung in the same manner as above: <br /> | |||
Washington <br /> | |||
We'll be washing a ton of sheets after the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Carter <br /> | |||
Slap her, cuff her, cart her off to the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Abell <br /> | |||
A bell will ring to start the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Gladiator <br /> | |||
I'm glad he ate her out before the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Wilma<br /> | |||
Will my finger keep me satisfied until the next...<br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Thatcher<br /> | |||
Dude, was that your sister I saw you fucking at the...<br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Whiner<br /> | |||
Wine her, dine her, 69 her at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Turner <br /> | |||
Turn her over, and let's have another... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Herb <br /> | |||
Her brother loves to... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Oliver <br /> | |||
All of her clothes came off at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Betty <br /> | |||
Bet he didn't know it was his girl at the bottom of the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Professor<br /> | |||
Profess your lust to her at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Extinct <br /> | |||
It stinked like fish at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Mona <br /> | |||
Moan a little louder and we'll all join the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Sharon <br /> | |||
Share and share alike at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Ben <br /> | |||
Bend over so we can start the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Kenya <br /> | |||
Can ya give me directions to the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Rectum <br /> | |||
Wrecked 'em? Nearly killed 'em! At the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Urine <br /> | |||
You're in for sloppy seconds at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Ida <br /> | |||
Ida want another... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Charlie Pride <br /> | |||
Charlie Pride her pants off at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Dolly Parton <br /> | |||
Dolly's partin' her thighs at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
McMaster <br /> | |||
Mc-masturbated all over her at the... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
The following verses are sung in the same manner as above, in this order, except use the banana chorus: <br /> | |||
Knock knock <br /> | |||
Who's there? <br /> | |||
Banana <br /> | |||
Banana who? <br /> | |||
... <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
BANANA CHORUS: <br /> | |||
...banananana, Banana-nah! <br /> | |||
Bananana-nah-nah! <br /> | |||
Bananana-nah, nananana-nah! <br /> | |||
Bananana-naaaah! <br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Orange<br /> | |||
Aren't you glad that I didn't say...<br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
Watermelon<br /> | |||
Watermelon? I meant to say...<br /> | |||
<br /> | |||
ENDING:<br /> | |||
And now she's older, and turning grey.<br /> | |||
She only gangbangs twice a day...<br /> | |||
But when she was younger, and in her prime<br /> | |||
She used to gangbang all the time!<br /> |